Sep. 15, 2024

Series: AFTER GOD’S OWN HEART   9-15-24

Choosing to Forgive

(2 Samuel 16, 19)     

“Forgive” is a VERB, “Forgiving” is a ________________!

A. AN EXAMPLE OF COMPLETE FORGIVENESS:

Round One: Shimei’s Harassment

2 Samuel 16:5-8 5 As King David approached Bahurim, a man from the same clan as Saul's family came out from there. His name was Shimei… and he cursed as he came out. 6 He pelted David and all the king's officials with stones, though all the troops and the special guard were on David's right and left. 7 As he cursed, Shimei said, "Get out, get out, you man of blood, you scoundrel! 8 The Lord has repaid you for all the blood you shed in the household of Saul, in whose place you have reigned. The Lord has handed the kingdom over to your son Absalom. You have come to ruin because you are a man of blood!" 

Abishai’s Counsel: 

2 Samuel 16:9 9 Then Abishai… said to the king, "Why should this dead dog curse my lord the king? Let me go over and cut off his head." 

David’s Response: 

2 Samuel 16:10-12 10 But the king said, "What do you and I have in common, you sons of Zeruiah? If he is cursing because the Lord said to him, 'Curse David,' who can ask, 'Why do you do this?'” 11 David then said to Abishai and all his officials… “Leave him alone; let him curse, for the Lord has told him to. 12 It may be that the Lord will see my distress and repay me with good for the cursing I am receiving today." 

B. HINDRANCES TO FORGIVENESS: 

(Common Reactions when we’re Offended)

1. __________________ forgiveness

2. __________________ forgiveness 

3. __________________ forgiveness

4. __________________ forgiveness

Colossians 3:13 13 Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. 

Round Two: Shimei sings a different song

2 Samuel 19:19-20 19 And said to (David) him, "May my lord not hold me guilty. Do not remember how your servant did wrong on the day my lord the king left Jerusalem. May the king put it out of his mind. 20 For I your servant know that I have sinned, but today I have come here as the first of the whole house of Joseph to come down and meet my lord the king."

Abishai’s Counsel:

2 Samuel 19:21 21 Then Abishai… said, "Shouldn't Shimei be put to death for this? He cursed the Lord's anointed." 

David’s Response:

2 Samuel 19:22-23 22 David replied, "What do you and I have in common, you sons of Zeruiah? This day you have become my adversaries! Should anyone be put to death in Israel today? Do I not know that today I am king over Israel?" 23 So the king said to Shimei, "You shall not die." And the king promised him on oath. 

David was able to Forgive Shimei because:

Ø    He was Aware of his own ___________________.

“Forgiveness is the fragrance the violet sheds on the heel that has ________________ it.”

Ø    His Focus was ______________________. 

“To be forgiven is such sweetness that honey is tasteless in comparison with it. But yet there is one thing sweeter still, and that is to forgive. As it is more blessed to give them to receive, so to forgive rises a stage higher in experience than to be forgiven.” Charles Spurgeon

C. PRACTICAL SUGGESTIONS WITH FORGIVENESS:

     1. Develop a Thicker Layer of ______________.

     2. Try to Understand where your ______________ is coming from.

     3. Recall Times in your life when you have _________ forgiveness.

“He who cannot forgive others breaks the _____________ over which he himself must eventually __________.”

CONFUSION ABOUT FORGIVENESS:

•    Forgiveness is not saying that things are okay now, and then going back into an abusive situation. 

•    Forgiveness is not letting someone off the hook by saying, “You didn’t do anything wrong.” 

•    Forgiveness is not unconditional love with no boundaries or accountability.

•    Forgiveness is not denial that a hurtful situation exists, and it isn’t denying the fact that your feelings are hurt. 

•    Forgiveness doesn’t mean you accept the person’s behavior.  

WHAT DOES GOD SAY ABOUT FORGIVENESS?

•    We Forgive because we have been forgiven by God. (Eph 4:32)

•    We Forgive in obedience to God. (Matt 6:14-15; Rom 12:18)

•    We Forgive others to gain control of our lives from hurt emotions. (Gen 4:1-8)

•    We Forgive so we won’t become bitter and defile those around us. (Heb 12:14-15)

D. SIGNS OF TRUE FORGIVENESS:

True Forgiveness is Experienced when you…

1. Are willing to Bury the hatchet and the ________________!

Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

2. Reject thoughts of ______________________!  

1 Thessalonians 5:15 Make sure that nobody pays back wrong for wrong

Definition of Forgiveness: 

“Giving up my right to ___________ you, for hurting me.”

3. Are Praying for them to _____________________!

Luke 6:28 …pray for those who mistreat you. 

4. Are Sad when they ______________!

Proverbs 24:17 (NASB) 17 Do not rejoice when your enemy falls, And do not let your heart be glad when he stumbles

5. Are willing to Help them out in time of ______________! 

Luke 6:35 But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. 

6. Seek Reconciliation regardless of who’s at _____________! 

Matthew 5:23-24 "Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, 24 leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.

E. THE GOSPEL OF FORGIVENESS:

2 Corinthians 5:18–20 18 All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: 19 that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting people’s sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. 20 We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ’s behalf: Be reconciled to God.